Aight,
Lets get this shit outta the way first; I watched one (1) episode of celebrity big brother because I didn't have the remote and the bre I was chillin with wouldn't change the fuckin thing. This shits only relevant because aside for your usual thin coating of Z list motherfuckers like piss on the outside of a public toilet there's Kerry Katona (aight the bitch is Z list as fuck but she's the only one I can remember). I hear a lot of shit about how people wouldn't fuck Kerry 'my ass would literally devour your cock' Katona, which is weak as fuck. Look at the bitch, she'd swallow that shit like an Iceland party canope platter (all for under £5). Even when she had a few extra pounds she was still insanely fuckable. Checkitout: I just google image'd her and found this photo which she's obviously not prepared for (I had to go on some celebrity site to get this ting so y'all owe me) -
LOOK AT THE SIZE OF HER TITS - and they're not even fake, you could get a good night's sleep on those bad boys and your neck would feel boss when you woke up in the morning, lick that tight ass stomach and get some A.M. violation goin on. Let me break it down a)She blatantly cooks a good breakfast - I don't think she got fat from Iceland freebies, she knows her way around a frying pan like a Nepalese sherpa knows Everest.
b)She knows how to party - she admitted she's been off her delicious tits on coke and prescription drugs (much love Wikipedia) so she's got a decent enough hookup and she'll probably let you do some sick shit when she's all fucked up
c)She's got a sense of humour - she smoked and drank during her pregnancies and got the British Heart Foundation and some infant death group all pissy which I think is fuckin hilarious.
d)You could teach her kids the dumbest shit - She leaves her kids for weeks on end (Celebrity Big Brother innit) so you could put all sorts of crazy shit in their heads. The little motherfuckers probably have foetal alcohol syndrome anyways so it's not like you'd feel guilty.
I hope I've convinced you that Kerry Katona is tight as fuck and would be hella fun to be screwin, I've convinced myself even more just writing this ting. I'd fuck Kerry Katona so much that the Oxford English Dictionary would have to invent some new shit up and when they invited me to the ceremony or whatever those word bitches do when they put somethin new in there I wouldn't be able to go because she'd still be having an orgasm.
I've read too much of that woman shit to get my facts straight for this one ('Hello' should be renamed to 'Get back in the kitchen and live your own life you emptyheaded ass bitch') so imma watch some K-1, drink a 40 and clean my guns. Nah for once I'm not talking about having a wank
Peace
LOOK AT THE SIZE OF HER TITS - and they're not even fake, you could get a good night's sleep on those bad boys and your neck would feel boss when you woke up in the morning, lick that tight ass stomach and get some A.M. violation goin on. Let me break it down a)She blatantly cooks a good breakfast - I don't think she got fat from Iceland freebies, she knows her way around a frying pan like a Nepalese sherpa knows Everest.
b)She knows how to party - she admitted she's been off her delicious tits on coke and prescription drugs (much love Wikipedia) so she's got a decent enough hookup and she'll probably let you do some sick shit when she's all fucked up
c)She's got a sense of humour - she smoked and drank during her pregnancies and got the British Heart Foundation and some infant death group all pissy which I think is fuckin hilarious.
d)You could teach her kids the dumbest shit - She leaves her kids for weeks on end (Celebrity Big Brother innit) so you could put all sorts of crazy shit in their heads. The little motherfuckers probably have foetal alcohol syndrome anyways so it's not like you'd feel guilty.
I hope I've convinced you that Kerry Katona is tight as fuck and would be hella fun to be screwin, I've convinced myself even more just writing this ting. I'd fuck Kerry Katona so much that the Oxford English Dictionary would have to invent some new shit up and when they invited me to the ceremony or whatever those word bitches do when they put somethin new in there I wouldn't be able to go because she'd still be having an orgasm.
I've read too much of that woman shit to get my facts straight for this one ('Hello' should be renamed to 'Get back in the kitchen and live your own life you emptyheaded ass bitch') so imma watch some K-1, drink a 40 and clean my guns. Nah for once I'm not talking about having a wank
Peace
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